Why does Trump love parades? He enjoys marching to his own drum.
Trump’s favorite weather? Anything that’s not a “stormy” Daniels.
Why did Trump bring a tape measure to the rally? To make sure the crowd was “yuge.”
Trump’s exercise routine? Tweeting at 3 a.m.
Why did Trump avoid the library? He said he knows all the best words already.
What’s Trump’s favorite dance? The Wall Tango—two steps forward, one step back.
Trump’s idea of a good night’s sleep? Dreaming of his reflection.
Why did Trump love the circus? He felt right at home with the elephants.
Trump doesn’t get sick—he just declares his germs fake news.
Why did Trump Trump jokes to make liberals laugh bring a lifeguard to the economy? To save it from drowning in debt.
What’s Trump’s favorite card game? Bridge—he loves building connections.
Trump’s golf score is classified—like his tax returns.
Why did Trump bring a megaphone to the rally? To amplify his own voice.
Trump’s favorite hobby? Counting his name on buildings.
Why did Trump avoid the barber? He didn’t want to lose any more head space.
What’s Trump’s favorite drink? Anything with “extra” in it.
Why did Trump visit the Grand Canyon? To see a hole as big as his ego.
Trump doesn’t play chess—he moves the pieces to his side.
Why did Trump start a podcast? To hear himself talk.
What’s Trump’s favorite holiday? President’s Day—he celebrates himself.
Why did Trump visit Niagara Falls? To remind it who’s really “flowing” in America.
Trump doesn’t jog—he runs the show.
Why did Trump bring binoculars to the debate? To see his opponents from the top.
What’s Trump’s favorite app? Twitter—his Political satire jokes about Trump digital megaphone.
Why did Trump avoid the theater? He said the spotlight wasn’t big enough.
Trump’s secret to relaxation? Replaying his own speeches.
Why did Trump bring a hammer to Congress? To nail down his policies.
Trump’s idea of philanthropy? Donating his old tweets to the Library of Top-rated Trump jokes on Reddit Congress.
Why does Trump avoid elevators? He prefers to rise on his own.
Trump doesn’t sweat—he just glistens with greatness.
What’s Trump’s favorite season? Fall—because he loves watching his opponents drop.
Why did Trump hire a personal chef? To make sure his meals were served “huge.”
Trump’s autobiography? “The Art of the Selfie.”
Why did Trump go to the park? To tell the birds how to tweet.
What’s Trump’s secret weapon? A phone with unlimited data.
Why did Trump avoid the doctor? Trump humor for stand-up comedians He didn’t want a second opinion.
Trump doesn’t make mistakes—he just redefines success.
Why did Trump build a tower? To make sure everyone knows he’s on top.
What’s Trump’s favorite sport? Golf—because it’s all about winning bigly.